Yes! That CAN be my next tweet

OK. So, I don't think I've made much of a secret of the fact that I just can't get into Twitter. I can't. Unless I'm staring at it 24/7, I feel like I'm missing everything that's going on. And, I don't like trying to figure out what people have responded to me about which tweet. It's just all so very exhausting. Facebook puts it all so neatly in its own little comment thread, with pretty little notices to tell you who commented about what. So pretty. So OCD. I don't care if it means I'm not young and hip. I'm a Facebook girl.

But, I do feel Twitter guilt. Like, if I just tried harder, I could make my relationship with Twitter work. (Wait. Am I in an abusive relationship with Twitter?!) So, when I saw the link to "Yes. That can be my next tweet." I was sold. Please, all-knowing website, tell me what to tweet. Then Twitter won't feel so used by me just putting links to my blog posts up there.

It told me this:

Ahhh. shucks. thanks so much! AND being scolded. by my car. i've opened the house. i hate that!

(Ummm. Should this all be one tweet? If so, I hope I've learned my lesson about opening the house to the self-righteous car. But, then. It looks like I have. And, I wonder what I'm so humbly thankful for? Not the car. That's for sure.)

So, that can't be right. I tried again:

Well that's a Snowman That Keep Me Up at the radio. hope you should move.

(This isn't getting any better. Now it seems English has become my second language.)

Again:

The what a warning. sorry. my car make me it's more fun with me it's more fun with the full face = the.

(And, now I've suffered a full break with reality. Or a stroke. But, at least it seems to be "fun." But, the car again. Why does Twitter want to keep talking about my car? It's a five-year-old Hond Pilot, Twitter. Let it go.)

And, finally:

Oh. My compulsion is 11 days before Halloween. Is this "twitter" thing EVER on?! Who Taught Her - The Johnsons.

(I believe that about sums it up. But, might I warn everyone to steer clear of me on October 20th. Compulsions are not to be taken lightly, people.)

Or this:

Well. I don't know which direction to talk about it up here?! wait. there's PIZZA.

(That's always my reaction to pizza.)

Anyway. What were we talking about? Did someone say, "pizza?"